A loving friend asked how the transition to fall life was going. “It’s a shit show.” I texted back in total disbelief that those four words were true. I sat and stared at my phone realizing I had answered in the most honest way I could, and that honesty totally sucked.

I have never been the mama that forgot the forms or misplaced the school calendars. I have never been the mama that completely lost their cool over shoelaces, ponytails, and burnt toast. I’m losing my cool more than I care to admit.

In an effort to find some semblance of order I met with the teachers at the big human’s school. They are brilliant, and told me to get rid of tie sneakers and call it, losing a battle to win the war. Ironically all their advice was for me. They weren’t worried about the small ones.

It was again a rough week. The tiniest is struggling to cut brutal lower eye teeth. And the entitlement is running rampant. No one wants to eat, and no one wants to sleep. The amount of hours we beg tiny humans to simply survive is unreal. “Just eat the food so you grow and thrive! Just sleep the hours so you feel strong tomorrow!!” Please just survive.

I know we will all survive, and arguably thrive. The working and going to school piece is kind of unreal. The working and going to school with high volunteer responsibilities is totally insane. I think I have a spouse too. I see him sometimes, he cooks me food.

A few hours ago I planned out the week, and I made lists. (I forgot to schedule riding lessons.) It’s a work in progress, but in pretty pink pen, it almost seemed manageable. I even wrote out the check for the daycare, which I will probably forget in the kitchen, while I’m begging a tiny to eat their breakfast, as I pull hot rollers out of my hair, and hope for a more peaceful week.

But we got Halloween costumes today, and they love them, and that’s a win. We will persevere. #mamastrong because there is no other way.

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